♡ SEX WORK: A COMPLETELY VALID, RESPECTABLE PROFESSION ♡

This topic alone is extremely controversial, makes a good amount of people uncomfortable, and everyone will have their own opinion — but here is mine: any / all forms of sex work are completely valid jobs. Why shouldn't it be? 

✨ you work real hours ( usually more than the average 9-5 because you can be camming, dancing, making content, engaging with clients / etc for way longer than a standard work day, except there is no: insurance benefits, paid time off, getting paid overtime, and absolutely no SET pay ( unless it is through a paid pork agency or general guaranteed paid job where you know how much you’ll make ) so yes, we work ….. A LOT. )

💕 you make real money ( which most will generally pay real taxes on ) & often a lot more than even high paying “normal” jobs. A lot of girls I know make more than a lawyer or doctors yearly salary & are usually having A LOT more: freedom, fun, time, & sanity. 

✨ you learn normal ( and extra ) work / people skills - which in my opinion ( especially as someone who has worked normal jobs and still does - harder to do & gain these skills because you don’t have the same resources as you do working for a company ) you have to do your own advertising, learn A LOT about safety, sales & marketing, emotion regulation, screening your clients, how to be assertive when you have to be & how to set + learn boundaries with yourself / customers, time management, $$$ management, compartmentalizing your personal life from your work life, photo / editing skills on top of general social media management, being safe in the ways of : getting tested, being discrete, etc, & at least 20 more skills. 

💕 we have real bills that we have to pay too. We pay rent, we pay rent to work at clubs, we pay for our licenses to dance in some states, we pay for our health / dental insurance, we pay for our STD tests, we pay car insurance, SDGE bill, you name it - we pay the same bills that you do as well. If this wasn’t a “real” job, we’d be able to escape real responsibilities, right? 

& yet I still find people who would *truly* rather see me / others work a minimum wage job & not caring if there is a financial struggle or if I’m miserable because “at least I’m making an honest living”, “at least you aren’t selling your body”, and whatever other bullshit reasons people tell themselves to make them more comfortable. It sucks how many people I have personally had to cut out of my life because these were their views and that that opinion alone showed me they didn’t really care about what was best for me. Believe me, I know sex work has a lot of downsides and risks. Every job does, this one is just a little more extreme when the worse case scenario happens - but, as a sex worker, I like to think we all know these things to extents and just know it’s a part of the job and CAN happen, which is why we practice so much safety. I know what I picked when I picked this industry. It made me feel like they didn’t want what was best for me + my mental health because of the simple fact of knowing they’d be much happier if I was miserable working for a legit company. 

If someone is happy doing whatever SW profession and they CHOSE to do it ( being trafficked / pimped out is completely different ) - then yes, we most likely actually like what we are doing and completely know we CAN work a normal job or do both, but we choose to keep sex work because of the benefits it has. 

I cannot wait for the day ( imagining a stereotypical Thanksgiving dinner ) a distant relative you haven’t seen in years asks what you’re doing and you say, “stripper, pornstar” whatever it is, and it’s met with the same reaction as “data analysis for x,y,z company”. I know it’s an extremely optimistic view, but hey, one day it might happen. 

So with that - here is a letter I am writing purely from personal experience to consumers of sex work or just anyone who doesn’t agree or at least acknowledge this view point. 💕

dear “you”,

    I am writing this to show you that underneath your current views, we are as human as you are. A lot of the misconceptions of sex work come from societal norms and how people are raised / etc. When I was growing up, I was told that stripping, porn, anything like that was considered the lowest or worst thing someone can do and that only people who are super desperate for money do that. I never fully believed it, but could see why people saw it that way based on the examples they would show me. When I was 16, I had a lot of friends who were 18 years old then and started stripping - of course anyone who found out ridiculed them, got disowned from family, etc. & that is when it really hit me : there is nothing wrong with the job, but there is everything wrong with how people treat most people who are in this job. 

    In my every day life, you wouldn’t guess I was in the industry at all - and in my experience, that goes for a lot of people in the industry as well. I go to the grocery store, do my laundry & clean my place, take care of my cat, hang out with friends / family, have my own stresses & struggles, go to the dentist, get annoyed in traffic, and all that other normal shit that I can keep going on about, but I guess it’s just interesting that some people truly think the only things that exist in our lives is sex, drugs, and work - like we have no outside life, no hobbies, nothing. As someone who obviously will fight for this industry and rights for people in it, I am just trying to show you that we aren’t really any different than you other than our job. 

    To the people who consume our services, you are the market. If there wasn’t a huge demand, there wouldn’t be any supply ( us ), but thanks to our lovely consumers, we are able to fulfill whatever needs it may be. When you are in the club, you are getting a version of me - one that is an exaggerating version of my real self, but still me. I am not “dirty” for what I do, I am not “less than” because of what I do, I do not feel “ashamed” because of what I do, and I sure as hell do not think I am “immoral / total whore” for what I do. No one is. People who think this line of work isn’t real or isn’t respectable can go fuck themselves in my opinion. I don’t care about coming off as rude / inappropriate to people who don’t like me regardless and vice versa. I think if anything - this job is as respectable as any normal job if not more. Why? Because we put up with SO much shit, we know how to be professional, we know how to talk to people and use our sales skills along with people skills to make sure our clients have a good time, we work not just physically but also mentally & emotionally - which would be hard for anyone. We do so much to prepare ourselves for work, AT work, and after work, and it sucks that it isn’t normalized to really talk about our work lives to people without fear of judgement, people using us for $$, people only wanting to have sex with us after they find out what we do, being outed, etc. We deserve SO much better than that. The quote, “someone you love is a sex worker” is more often than not true. Please think about that and think about WHY this line of work makes you so uncomfortable. When people find the root as to why it makes them uncomfortable, it opens up a lot for that person because it’s a root of something. I don’t necessarily think people choose to be whoreaphobic or anything, I think it’s more of a flaw in society. If your reason is because you have been fucked over by someone in the industry, I get that it sucks, but you also have to know we aren’t all like that. Just like any job, someone sucks at it or messes up SOMETHING, but I don’t hold that to be true to every person in that field, I just know I had a bad experience or two and to just not go to those people anymore. 

All I ask is that you at least think about these different points and ask yourself these questions — challenge yourself, it’s fun.

love,

me. 

ANYWAYS - that was long & i hope this made sense. i want to add more or do a part two, but for now this is what it is. If you’d like me to add anything else in the part 2: comment below or personally message me. 

love,

emotional stripper ♡